Who I’m

I just realized that I have started this blog without introducing my self.. not that anyone is actually reading this blog right now, I only got one view.

Anyway, I'm a  girl from Iraq. Part of my childhood was in Iraq, I survived during the time when Saddam was ruling the country, and I survived the War On  Terror " War Of  Terror". After few years of constant fear and threats, my family decided it's time to look for a new home.
  

In The Name Of Honor

Alright, I had no wifi for the last 2 months so I wasn’t able to post any entry here… this was written after the Iraqi media exploded due to the death “killing” of that Iraqi girl who her killer was forgiven as it was considered as an honor crime!!

 

According to the Iraqi constitution, Section Two “Rights and Liberties”, Chapter One: Civil and Political Rights, Article 14: Iraqi’s are equal before the law without discrimination.
While if you read the Death penalty, Article 409: it will say if you find your wife in bed with another man you can kill her and only spend three years in jail.
Oops *reality slap over here between your civil rights as an individual and death penalty that gives “honor crimes” killers soft sentences! In some cases ‘most of the time’ killers would be forgiven because obviously honor killing is something completely normal and understandable act not only in Iraq but in the middle east in general.

Can’t Be Loved

 

 

He makes me want to write more, I feel I want to tell him all about my day and thoughts. Yet every time I want to take a step forwards instead I take 5 steps back because we are different people..  even though we actually think and like the same things, even though we have heaps in common between us, so much in common between us that I sometimes feel like we are twins. Yet, we are still different people.

BACK TO WRITING..

 

I have always enjoyed writing, never knew how much of a good writer I was until 2011. I started to show my work to my friends in school and my Arabic teacher, most of the time I had positive feedback. That’s what kept me going in writing, a year later I was introduced into the Syrian rap. Moudy Al-Arabi was one of the first Syrian rappers I started to listen to their music. Then i decided to try new writing style.. which is rap. I really got into it so much, I don’t think I was this bad, actually I kept doing it till mid 2015, after that I just stopped writing rap songs and went back into just writing.

I’m in Pieces

“I’m in pieces.” Finch, All The Bright Places

Which is what I’m feeling now.. I’m not just in pieces but I’m in so much pain that no words will be enough or feel right to describe this feeling right now. I feel so tired so sick of the current Iraq, those governors who try to control the country, those religious groups, corruption, poverty, IS and many more things that are happening in Iraq right now.. even the USA.. few days ago I saw a clip for Ellen from The Ellen show.it was about her interview with president W. Bush!!

I didn’t watch it all just few minutes, less than 3 minutes. Something made me laugh so hard is when Ellen said to Bush “I heard you rescued a puppy..”

Where were you? – Où étiez vous ?

Woman of the Orient

In the past few days, my mind has been a battlefield. Thoughts slamming around, wrenching the bits of sanity left in me. And one question hits the hardest.

Where were you?

Almost 6 six years of war, and never have I ever seen the name of my city, the name of Aleppo, printed, typed, written or said as much, never have I ever received as many messages of support as I have these past days. It almost felt like war had just started and I was the only one, not aware of it.

Almost six years of heartbreak and pain. Yet, suddenly the world feels for my people, my city.

So I wonder if it only gets outrageous for you when you find it on the first page of the latest magazine?

I would love to believe the warmth of your words of support and scandalized reactions but I have…

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A Terrifying Future!

Now, I have lived in Iraq and Syrian before and after things got so messy, what happened/ happening in both of the countries did/ still affect me, being far from those two countries does bothers me as I now hear and see them by the eyes of the media.. which I don’t trust that much..

It’s been 13 years for Iraq and 6 years for Syria, those are not just numbers which count how many days those people have been living in none-stopping fight A L O T has happened, don’t let me start talking about the enormous human lost for those two countries for the! for the love of god we are one of the main reasons why right now there is a  refugee crisis!

Things are getting worse and worse day after day, the assassination of the Russian ambassador in Turkey will differently affect things in Syria. It won’t be a 6 years war or 10 years.. I’m afraid it will go on just like in Iraq, everything I have seen in Iraq i’m witnessing it in Syria as well, and that’s very terrifying thing.

 

WHY I’M UNKNOWN GIRL?

I’m really shacking right now! I was just about to delet this blog page that I’ve created, let me take my breaths and tell you what just happened happened..

I left my phone on charge, and went on the iPad to read for D. Ali Alwardi The Sultans’ Preachers واعظ السلاطين, then I heard my phone buzzing. When I checked it I saw someone commented on a post on my google+.

Let me first explain why I call myself as Unknown Girl, I’m allowing you to see this Unknown side that I don’t show in my life outside this blog. I don’t talk politics, war, emotions or things like that. I read and collect info, I listen more than I’d talk and try to annlise the people around me . I prefer not to give my opinions most of the time. 

So we can say my family don’t know about this of me. I don’t think they would mind it at all. My dad has always been so open about politics war in Iraq and after spoke, and written about it publicly in his name. Right now I think I still got a lot to learn and understand before I become ready to stop being Unknown.

Anyway back to what just happened, this person who commented on my post ‘something I shared’ he had the same name as my dad, his comment was in Arabic. For few minutes I thought that my dad found out about this blog.. so I freaked the sh*t out! Well ya I know is not like I’m planing to invade North Korea I’m just writing my thoughts in a blog, so need to freak out ! 

To Riverbend | Baghdad Burning

I just sent an E-mail to Reiverbend.. It was messy.. oh god very messy out-of-place so much grammatical mistakes everywhere.. it was so informal. After I re-read it I felt like it was 7 years old language!

It doesn’t matter.. it was my first email to send to her.. I really look up to her a lot, she is the reason how i made it till today. I wish her nothing but the very best.. I hope she is living a better life now..

 

Keep living,
xox unknown girl

Just a 17 years old teenagers

OKAY, that’s the third time I type this. idk why no word I’m writing is saved! usually when you write anything in WordPress it get saved  automatically, but not right now, idk is it because I’m using WordPress app on my broken phone?

I was saying how it was almost 4 am while I’m writing this but now it’s 4.15. anyway for the last two hours I was watching the news,  I watched so much news that it gave me headache right now. Even though I was meant to be studying for my final drama exam which is today at   1 pm.

The Cold Worm Winter – 2013

When I remember 2013,  I see it as in two parts.. The first part is when I was still living in Syria, in year 7. While the other half is when I left everyone without saying goodbye and came here. I’ll be talking about my first part.. Because it plays such a big role on my life..
It was cold, very cold like freezing. The entire city was wearing its white dress from all the snow ❄ that was covering it. 2013 just started, to be more specific it was new years eve. I was wearing red and white knitted jumper, older sister was wearing dark green shirt, younger sister was wearing a  purple coat, mum was wearing a red coat and dad as heaps of layers. We brought a cake and went to celebrate it with our close friends who lived across the street..  They were and still like my family, even closer than my family. I started 2013 sounded with love and with hopes something will finally change.